Mothering.

"Your love, O Lord, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the sky." Psalms 36:5

My eNtiRe life CHaNgeD when I became a MOM. It was SHoCKIng. A wild & fierce LoVE took hold of my HEaRt. I still haven't ReCoVeRed.  I have a hard time remembering anything before KidS. It's like in the Wizard of Oz when EvERytHinG is in black & white until they FiNaLLy get to OZ and suddenly...BAM!...CoLoR.  BRILLiaNt & bEAuTiFuL. ChRySTaL CLaritY. CRAZy LOvE. So SUrPRISING. IT cOmPLetLeY wREcKeD me. For-EVeR. Challenging. Refining. Humbling. Overwhelming me. It's ScARy. It's SaCreD. It's MaGiCAL. It's the BeSt GIfT.

 SO.......OvErNigHt.....My TwO little people got BiG. Born & RaiSed. Move to faraway places. Living their OWN liVeS. Making their OWN plans. Dreaming their OWN dreams. Figuring things out. LearNinG BIg lessons. ON. THEIR. OWN. Being their cool grown-up selves. Brave.  Resilient. Full of adventure. AND the thing is..actually.....I'm happy to report... I'M FINALLy getting GOOd with NOT being in CHARgE of THEM.  NOT knowing their eVErY mOvE. I'm no longer RuNninG The SHoW. Apparently, I'm NoT the BOSS of either one of them AnYmOrE. EvER AGaIN.  They're gLaD about it.  I'm GLaD about it.  (Jeff's really glad about it:) It's Tricky. & Lovely. & a Relief.  We're slowly learning a new way of BEING with each other.  It feels right & good. Healthy. Grown up & FUn. I SEE my KIdS in a new LIgHt.  I REaLLy REaLLy LIKE them. Exactly the WAY they ARe. We're becoming good FRIeNds. I LoVE that;)

This fiERcE kind of LOVE. It's not NEW. It started with God. & His own SON.  ThEn. Came to US & OUrS.  It's TRUSTWORThY & UNCoNdITIoNAL. SAfE & UnEnDinG. REDEEMInG. TRUE. It's FAiTHFul. EVERyWHERE. In SacRamEnTo. in SaNtA bARbARA. WHERevER my TWO ARE....HE is THERe. HIS FiErCe LOVE keeps THEm. No WoNdErinG. nO WoRRyinG.

Oh. and for the record... MY FiERcE LOVE is NOTHING compared to HIS. yep. HArd to IMaGINE.
But....REALLy ReAlly helpful for a Mama to KNOW. ❤