Riley was home for Christmas a few days. He met some friends at the Padre on Sunday evening and sent me a text inviting me to come down and have a drink with them. "WhaaaWhaat"!!! Seriously? You and your hip.young.cool.beautiful people WANT ME...to JOIN you!!! Umm..let me think about itYES! (quick change out of the p.j.s first...be right there.) I scrunched in a table with them and felt like the luckiest mom on the planet. They were in the middle of deep relationship discussions and wanted to pick my brain. Alright. Shoot. 'What's the secret to a happy marriage?' Hmmmm..well. I gave them all the wisdom I could muster. Everything I said sounded a little cliche....a bit formulated...the usual things they've been told for-ever. I heard it as I was talking....I wasn't believing my own words....so what came out at the end surprised even me...'you know what guys..to be honest...I think it's a crapshoot.' CRAPShOoT. Ha! We laughed and toasted to IT. (hope they weren't looking for something a bit more spiritual;). You love who you love. You grab hands. You jump. ALL IN.
Marriage is a mystery to me. I wish I had a formula. You know like 'marry Christian' or 'marry money' or 'marry values' or 'marry best friend' or 'marry the one you can't live without' and THEN then then then....you will live happily-ish ever after. If only. But.....honestly...after 30 years married....I'm calling marriage a cRaPshoot. Gamble. Risk. Uncertain venture. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose. Harsh, I know. But true. Pick your person and then work like hell to build a healthy-ish&happy-ish life together. Sometimes it lasts. Sometimes it doesn't. CrapSHOOT. It's just how it is.
I got lucky. All these years and I'm happily married. SO Happy. Of course there's a back story. I'm going to tell it. But for now. The thing that I want to say & that matters most is JEFF LOVES ME WELL. I FEEL adored by him. He's learned the secret. I'm certain it hasn't been an easy feat.
But. He figured it out. He's really something special. He's taken my happiness seriously. He listens. He adjusts. In return. I have a wild crush on him. After thirty whole years. Lots of life. I'm still crazy in love. We got lucky. Rolled the dice and won. Hallelujah.
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